The really great thing about Sweet Home Alabama* (aside from the fact that it’s basicially the Bachelorette Lite) is how the city boys they’ve picked are the most metrosexual dudes of all time. Two of them have soul patches! One scene featured the hairstylist from LA sitting one of the other dudes down to fix his steps. Um, what? I don’t know where they found these massively stereotypical dudes!

The country boys say things like “dagum!” and drawl about treating a girl riiiiight, which mostly seems to entail telling Paige that they could protect her. Nice. That’s all I look for in a boy. One of the country boys (named Bubba) proclaimed that all dudes “love to get their hands bloody.” Wow. Some real scary imagery there.

*Wait, are y’all not watching this show yet? But 11 city boys and 11 country boys compete to win a Southern girls heart! It’s amazing.